Ellis & Barnes: Serious Mothers!

Monday, August 21, 2006

Isn't That a Nun's Job?!

True story: On the train this morning I sat directly behind a nun. During the trip, I sneezed very loudly twice. She didn't bless me once. Nothing. She kept right on reading her nun book (which wasn't the bible, but something with a chapter called: "God Hears!"). I know she wasn't deaf because someone asked her how she was: ("Fine, thank you") and also - I wildly gesture when I sneeze.

What gives? Of course I wasn't going to challenge the nun (I just never, ever would challenge a nun like that - also I could see the scenario going the way of Larry David) - but isn't that kind of what they do?

I'm sorry....I guess even though I'm not religious, I expect a nun to bless someone when they sneeze.

Unless....she wanted the demons to stay inside me.

Boy, I must reek of asshole.

PS - But wouldn't Jesus (if he was real) help assholes?


At 11:53 AM, Anonymous stuporfly said...

Perhaps she was concerned that, given your obvious depravity, you'd take the blessing as an overall blessing not associated with the sneeze. Perhaps she feared you'd run roughshod on the city, taking no prisoners as you raped and pillaged, and it would all be her fault because she'd blessed you. And maybe she was concerned that all of that would make the baby Jesus cry. I'm not religious, but from what I understand, that's kind of a bad thing to do.


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