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Ellis & Barnes: Serious Mothers!

Monday, July 21, 2008

Guess Who Had a Shitty Birthday Party

This guy! (...and by association this girl!)


(note to self...cheap fabric and bad positioning equals giant hip illusion...ILLUSION!)


Awesome right! Shitty Slave Leia and a Shitty Storm Trooper...who I like to imagine is actually Han Solo dressed as a Storm Trooper.


However, my breast plates look a tad like snails...but I think that adds to the theme of the party which was "World's Shittiest Costume Party."


I know, Stefan and I have pretty rad costumes for "shitty" but keep in mind that is all cardboard. Even my chain. I can't help it that I am AMAZING with card board.


In lieu of a band this year, we had karaoke. Can't get much shittier than that. The machine was delivered on Friday. I know you are asking yourself, "What are Biz and Stefan gonna do with a karaoke machine the day before the party?"

SING! All night. Don't ever think that Stefan and I will grow tired sitting alone in our apartment singing karaoke all night. Brother won't. And to add a layer of awkwardness to it, we had a house guest, who I haven't seen in like 8 years, who basically had to sit there and watch. "Hi, welcome to our home. Please enjoy us singing karaoke...for hours!"

Theming wise, Stefan did a great job...all signage was black sharpie on ripped up cardboard. The bathroom was labled "The Shitter." Good news! Stefan wants to keep that sign up...forever. (cough)

He made drinks...one cooler was called "Number 1" and looked like pee...pee apparently tastes like bananas. Who knew? The other cooler was called "Number 2" and was brown...what tastes like shit you ask? Long Island Iced Teas. I could have told you that with out the party.

I think I really added a touch of class by hanging a sign above the drinks that said "If it's yellow let it mellow (and drink it), if its brown drink it down." The definition of class.

We had a very good turn out and everyone came dressed as something...which we loved and stayed all night and sang and danced and had a blast. It was really an excellent party.

Sadly, most of the pictures came out like...shit...har dee har har....but below is what we got! Enjoy!

Here are Jay and Jaime. Jay claims to be someone from the Mets, but I don't follow baseball and prefer to think he is a shitty baseball fury from The Warriors. Jamie had my favorite costume.

Take a close look. On top there is a metal spider, she is wearing a cowboy hat and cowboy style clothing and on the hat there is a picture of Will Smith. You got it yet?



She is Wild, Wild West...aka...WILL SMITH'S SHITTIEST MOVIE! I love this so much. Bravo!

Something else I learned about Jaime at the party is that she loooooooves karaoke.




Greatest discovery ever. Look at that face! That is a face of pure joy.


This is a face of pure...something...



Looking good Arron...Juice Newton really moves me too. (Ok, he wasn't singing Juice Newton, but I love this picture.)

Another favorite costume was Livia who came as Biz at a corporate offsite.




I think she nailed my "look." You know the one that says "Please...just don't."

Ladies and gentlemen...I give you Shitty Slash from Guns and Roses.



Action Shot.

More favorites are Monica Hill as a Lower Case T and Olivia as a Chick Magnet.



We have the lovely Shayna as a Wedding Present


(if you can't see, there is a Crate and Barrel ribbon tied around her) and Katherine as a Dread Lock.


Who is that behind them? Oh, that is just a giant turd. For some reason, i have held on to this costume that comes with muscle arms and a brown...well...turd suit and together the costume is called Tough Shit. I think the word is again....class. Anyway, we decided we could give it away as the prize for the best shittiest costume.

Here is Chris O'Connor...what is he? Well....

He is a Detective...who happens to have...

...a dildo for a hand. It's not his fault. He is a detective.

Did I mention this should have been called the Classiest Party in the World?

Ok...here is Hilda in another brilliant costume. She is a LOOFA! Bravo! I love it!


I have no idea who these ladies are. I assume they are pals of Stefan. They were conjoined twins and i give them total props for staying like that ALL NIGHT! It was quite impressive.




Guess who this would be a personal hell for?

That's right...Corporate Offsite Biz.





Ok...so the top five costumes were Shitty Slash, Shitty Will Smith Movie, Shitty Baseball Fury from The Warriors, Noelle as a Bad Habit (sorry, no picture) and finally, the winner...

Stefan Sux!


And here is one last shot of Shitty Slave Leia and Shitty Han Solo as Shitty Storm Trooper.


Hopefully we will get more pictures or at lease links to pictures soon from people who know how to operate a camera.


Ta ta, Biz

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2 Comments:

At 4:58 PM, Blogger Jordi or Biz said...

Did I see any of these on Project Shitty Runway during Olympus Shitty Fashion Week?

I am so thrilled with the shitty results!
-Jordi

 
At 4:27 PM, Blogger cupcake said...

happy birthday stefan. you crazy mexican!

 

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