Ellis & Barnes: Serious Mothers!

Thursday, December 21, 2006


I'm in charge of the work birthdays.

Once a month I'll ask all the birthdays of that month what kind of cake they want for their end of month birthday 'party'. There's always 99% of the Birthday Group who says: 'Anything' and that %1 who demands to see a cake menu and then they end up wanting some crazy ice-cream cake that no one makes. Or they go back in time to 1952: "Can you order a money cake? It's a cake with loose change wrapped in saran wrap, and if you nearly eat the money you win!"

Actually my mother used to make money cakes for my birthday parties - seriously. But the kids nearly choked to death every time. So she stopped that and started sticking rum in the cakes. Oh, Mom.

On the birthday-day, we all gather in the Large Conference Room and sing an extremely sad: "Happy Birthday to You". Because I'm the 'performer' by night, I usually get asked to lead it. Yay. Then I serve cake while everyone eats. Then I make sure that all have had some before I clean up. If there's a piece left, I can have it. I'm supposed to have one saved for me, but the older engineers claim not to know that they're supposed to do that.

When cake is around, people get greedy and make the same lame jokes.

Cake makes the world sad.

Are YOU sad because of office cake?
Send us a picture!
Biz & Barnes
Bat Hat, USA



At 5:58 PM, Anonymous stuporfly said...

When I was in grade school, some NYC news channel shot a segment in our class. The day it was due to air, I had a bunch of friends over to watch our televised moment in the sun.

We were playing 'hide the penny' - which is nearly as dangerous as 'just the tip' - and I hid the penny where it wouldn't be found for days: My stomach.

A quick trip to the hospital with my overprotective mother, and I was told to keep an eye on my poop to make sure I passed it.

I passed it.

Money cake is no laughing matter, unless the punchline involves someone inspecting their own poop.


Post a Comment

<< Home