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Ellis & Barnes: Serious Mothers!

Tuesday, October 04, 2005

Nothing Precious About Biz when she is angry...

So I am in a very angry mood. My old friend D-Rock and I use to talk in Monster Speak when we were angry...kinda like "Biz mad and want to smash everything! Biz no like day job and want to smash people who press against her on the subway and stomp to death people who don't cc her on important emails! RAH!"

For some reason, the idea of defacing something notoriously sweet made me feel better. What is the epitome of sweetness? Precious Moments.

So I search for Precious Moments...and I find this....it is entitled "IF YOU COULD ONLY SEE HEAVEN."

I'm back....sorry about leaving, but I had to go vomit. Look at this! It makes me shudder all over. This Precious Moment is described as "This is a Chapel Exclusive figurine that has been created by Sam Butcher to honor a young girl who has been fighting many of life's hard trials. Approx 5" tall."

Fighting many hard trials? What does that mean? More importantly, what is the figurine implying? Is it implying that if the little one in your life's life is so awful, that they would be better off in heaven..which they will be in soon? Look how sad everything in that figurine looks! Heaven seems awful! "Hang in there precious, you'll be in dead soon."

Yikes

Yikes being said...


3 Comments:

At 5:36 PM, Blogger Biz and/or Jordi said...

(Jordi)

Good lord! Is this figurine named Luka? Maybe she's fought so hard because she's taking care of deadweights!

Get rid of the kid, the kitty and the lamb, Luka - it's okay to say ME FIRST.

Fucking grow a pair!

 
At 4:55 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm pretty sure that "young girl who has been fighting many of life's hard trials" is in reality 'Fighty Spirit Helen' from your story on September 29th...

 
At 6:46 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi Biz. I'm Crispin.

I love what you'e done to the little scamp, but the original is far more disturbing. It looks like it came from the 'Daddy Don't' collection.

Either way, I've saved both to my hard drive, just in case I'm ever under investigation for something. It'll make for lively debate as I'm being pistol-whipped.

 

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