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Ellis & Barnes: Serious Mothers!

Wednesday, March 29, 2006

(JORDI HAS SENT YOU AN E-VITE!) I'M KEEPING MY ALIEN DEVIL GHOST BABY!

Host: Jordana Barnes
When: Tuesday, June 6, 2525 6:00pm

"SUPRISE!!!"

That's how I felt when I was woken up one night by an alien devil ghost who promptly dragged me into his spaceship and made me his sex slave for a week (but really, it was more like a year Earth time.) But I'm back...and pregnant (?!) with who they say is a very IMPORTANT alien devil ghost baby. One who is supposedly powerful enough to decide our fates one day. A PROPHET alien devil ghost baby! And right now he's "predicting" that I'll be throwing up again in about five minutes!

When I first got pregnant, I wasn't that excited. In fact, I was terrified beyond reality and had night terrors and phantasms that would make me cut myself in my sleep and I wanted to do something about it. But then the crew from the ZXTK423 assured me that my alien devil ghost baby would try to eat it's way out of my body if it even SENSED any thoughts of termination on my behalf. I guess even though my alien devil ghost baby is the size of a peanut, it's mind is psychic, intelligent, extremely powerful and 1000% Pure Evil. He knows my every thought and action and can control me from my own womb.

The crew, (who will most likely take my alien devil ghost baby the second it's born), also made it known that if I try any "funny business" - I will be wearing a necklace made out of my own teeth! They said that they would make sure of it.....isn't that something? They should know better than to threaten a hormonal pregnant lady, huh? HA-HA! Pass the ice cream girlfriends!(Am I right?!)

A summer punch and ribs are on the menu so bring your appetites! We will also be playing charades and Boggle (especially if it rains.)

I hope you (and I!) can make it.

Love, Jordi.
PS - I will be needing some more name suggestions. I don't know...sometimes he feels like a Philip and other days he's a Xxzaphoyd-GarrrtokZHOULIAN-GAHHHHRRR!! It really could be a coin toss at this point. I'm also mad about Quentin!

(inspired by a true retarded e-vite baby shower image suggestion)

2 Comments:

At 12:23 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

CONGRATULATIONS?
-jason

 
At 12:44 PM, Blogger kc said...

I'm worried that Sfloeen, Rfjjq, Uoevc, and Vhkbs! will take this badly.

--pcshjxew
(the skinny kid who was always sick and whose parents wouldn't let him go to any sleepovers or watch any R or PG movies)

p.s. - are you sure it's not Prince's baby? you could name it 0(+>.

 

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